What person have you stumbled upon in the last year on the internet that has really helped you transform?
Meet Kristen Hadeed. Kristen wrote the book called, Permission to Screw Up. Her blog is unreal if you want to check it out. Click here. Her ethos as a leader is being authentic.
You’ll be less you when you’re worried about making a mistake.
The perfectionist monster that lives inside of you loves when you hesitate. Giving yourself permission to screw up tames this monster to the point where you can execute.
In the first 2 years of my coaching career, I was a perfectionist. That monster was in charge of my mind.
My meetings, my practice plans, my one to ones, my everything… Had to be perfect.
The big problem with this is, you become less “you.”
Inauthentic.
Unrelatable.
Robotic.
You know all the things you don’t want to become when your job is to connect with 20 plus human beings.
I recently read a Daily Discipline by Brian Kight that connected some of Kristen’s ideas together and got me thinking. Here’s what BK dropped:
Reality: I am going to make mistakes. Period. I acknowledge this about myself, my past, and my future. This does two things for me: (1) it frees me from trying to be perfect in my actions and (2) it prevents me from getting defensive when I know I’ve made a mistake.
Humility: I don’t have all the right answers. If I knew all the right things to do in every situation to always create the best results, I would do it. But I don’t. Life is messy, people are complex, and no matter how experienced or skilled I am, I’m still trying to create good results in an uncertain future, just like everyone else.
Identity: I am not defined by my mistakes. The biggest reason people avoid mistakes, or avoid admitting them, is fear of how it makes them look. Yes, I’ve made mistakes. Some minor, some significant. They’re part of my story but they don’t define my identity. Because if my mistakes are part of my story, then so is how I deal with them. My identity is the whole picture, not just the imperfections.
There are a few main points I want to drive home for coaches and players:
Not being perfect leaves more space for you to just be “you”
Don’t attach mistakes to who you are, they are a response you had… They don’t define you
Save space to give some grace…. Everyone is making mistakes
“Hi, my name is Drew, and I’m going to mess up today.”