I was a pro hockey coach in November. Well, almost… Had a job lined up but the interim HC won too many games during the limbo time.
Let’s dive into something I’ve been thinking about since that time…
Enter The Résumé Razor:
Before you get offended, here is some context.
A Razor Cuts at Ego
I almost became a pro hockey coach in November. From off my couch and out of the ‘game’ for 3 years. How?
Here’s what most people would have said from the outside:
Drew earned it by writing on the Internet for 3 years, expressing his ideas and it finally caught on with someone who took a leap of faith, he finally attracted ‘his people’
He built an online brand in the coaching space from nothing without a credibility stamp and earned the respect of his peers to get another shot at professional coaching
Neither of those would be the real truth, but it would make for a great story… Wouldn’t it? I had a different story written and ready to publish for the community had it worked out because…
I didn't almost get that job because I wrote on the Internet for three years.
I didn't almost get that job because I worked hard on building this brand and it got a bunch of respect and accolades.
I got a crack at it because the one person in hockey who calls me for jobs called me for a job. My best friend.
To the fancy academic world, it’s called nepotism.
Why create a shorthand rule of thumb to call out a ‘bullshit’ way of hiring? Why call yourself out and tell the real truth? Because most won’t do it. Because most people in our industry are too insecure, too proud or some ego combination of this:
Embarrassed to admit you didn’t get the job ‘the right way’
Ashamed to admit entitlement over working for it in a field that lives for ‘grinding’ and signals the ever-living fuck out of it
Afraid of what people would think if you told them the truth
So they project their own illusion of strength, their own ‘doing’.
They scored their goal and there were no assists on the play according to them.
And for those people, it feels great to score unassisted in your career…
Why?
People want to attribute their career growth and advancement to their own awesomeness and the fact that they are self-made. It’s a ‘better’ story. Feels better than ‘getting a handout’ or ‘help’. You gotta ‘do it yourself’ in our field. We are coaches. Proud, insecure and egos the size of Alaska.
The reality is not a great story to tell at parties… It’s a lot shorter too. 3 words is all you need.
“How’d you get that new cool coaching job?”
“I got help.”
What people forget in their story, choose to forget, or just don't say to the public is that somebody pulled them up into that job. You had help. Admit it.
So if I had got this job in the SPHL, some coaches who know me would have said, “ Congratulations, you worked hard, you deserve it. Like, it's probably because of your writing. I enjoy reading your stuff and your ideas. Glad they will be put to good use there.”
But what they don't know, unless I tell them… and I already had an article written to release for the community telling you the real reason I would have got the job. And it was because of nepotism.
“Drew, the lesson please…”
Okay, okay…
Don’t attribute to your self-made story what is attributed to someone else doing something to make the dream come true.
Said another way: It’s not what you do but what another says about you that makes you. Don’t get it twisted, you have to put in the hours, ‘the work’ or whatever the new ‘grind’ term is. Yes, getting up the learning curve is non-negotiable because you still have the run with the ball without choking if someone puts the silver spoon of nepotism in your mouth and hands you the ball.
Do you want a 2nd lesson that pairs as good or better than wine and cheese? How about this next one… When someone does pull you up early, don’t be an asshole and do this… That’s on tap for next week. Subscribe if you want it sent right to you.
P.S: 2nd Edition of The Wave is now available
I recently made a few subtractions to the book to raise its energy calibration from 120 to 563. I’ve alchemized the energy from that of Fear to that of Love.
If you haven’t bought the book yet or didn’t know I even had one out there, check it out (changed the cover color to white to signify the purification)
Click the tweet below to head to the book homepage and learn more :
Sometimes it’s WHO not HOW...also a great book by Ben Hardy. Great article!