Here’s a quote from Quinn Hughes on his relationship with the Canucks assistant, Adam Foote:
"I just think as a person, he coaches you how he'd want his kids to be coached. He's got two kids in the NHL and he understands the pressures, not only as a player but also as a parent and as a coach. I think he looks at it from those three perspectives.I think a lot of coaches don't know how to connect with their players and talk to them and teach them. I've seen and I hear stories around the league about a lot of coaches reaming out their players or what not. He's able to connect with you and talk to you and teach you. I've learned a lot from him as a player but also as a person, too."
Here is some news. No player has ever liked getting yelled at. No matter how many former NHL’ers on TV want to tell you the opposite.
Because anger imparts guilt. A sense of guilt creates separation and your people would rather connect than feel guilty and separate from you.
Quinn Hughes feels this intuitively and can articulate that feeling.
Hawkins has this quote in Power vs. Force:
“The body can discern, to the finest degree, the difference between that which is supportive of life and that which is not.”
Quinn Hughes knows when the ‘coaching intervention’ is constructive and based in love and when there is no love in the message. He speaks to it in this quote because he hears from peers around the league that their coaches aren’t all like Adam Foote.
Here’s the long and short of it… Messages that lack love are a call for help.
If you project fear, you are experiencing it in an area of your life.
This is why ‘do as I say, not as I do’ does not fly with this generation of player. They are either smarter, or less tolerant of the incongruency. The New Wave Coach must be the model of what it looks like. If you want players to treat each other with respect, treat them with respect. If you want their peer-to-peer feedback on the bench to be constructive, your messaging to them can’t be destructive.
Be the image you want reflected.
The players want you to level up your consciousness for this reason. The players are also tired of Old Guard Coaches for this same reason…
What is it? It’s another Hawkins quote:
The level of truth or falsehood of a statement depends on the level of consciousness from which it is made.
If you’re scratching your head at this quote, you might be asking, “What does this mean simply?”
The more love in you, the more love in your message. The more evolved and leveled up you are as a person, the better you can be for others. The more inner work you’ve done, the more outer help you can give others.
The more love in you and your message, the more others will be attracted and interested in what you have to say.
If you calibrate below 200, you are going to project what you believe is true but since it comes from that level, it cannot be. Every message below 200 is false. There can at best only exist the illusion of truth.
Level up because the players are already talking to their friends about how different their situation is.
The Wave comes for those who refuse to get their messaging above 200.
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