Ever wish you knew something at 18 that you do at 30?
High school and college education are seriously lacking in many major areas. As a coach, your job is to fill those gaps.
But if you’re reading this and you’re 16-18 because your coach is a good guy and shared it with you…
Consider yourself lucky for being exposed to these topics/ideas while you have time to relentlessly apply them in your life. I suggest clicking the links and diving deeper into them.
So what are three things I wish I learned while I was playing? Mindsets and mental models.
1. Self-Reflection Skill
There are 2 main points to be made here.
Self-awareness comes from self-reflection
Generic questions get generic answers, specific questions yield specific answers
Do you constantly question what, why, and how you’re doing things? The answer when you’re 17 years old is, “probably not.”
But this is an incredible habit to get into
How intentional was that rep?
What is the purpose of getting to this space on the ice when my teammates have the puck?
How uncomfortable did I get in that last drill?
Intent. Purpose. Skill.
Become aware of these 3 things in everything that matters to you in life. Hockey being one of them. It will become your edge. Your peers aren’t doing this.
Ask specific questions. Both to yourself and to your coaches
The best in the game are insanely curious. Tap into that lesson.
Instead of asking how can I get better, do some digging yourself.
Try this:
Watch your shifts
Markdown every time you kill the play ( you run out of space, a puck gets disrupted, turnover, punt, etc)
Then go back over each clip and ask yourself specific questions that will get the answers you want
Where is my immediate support?
Where is my next support?
Do I have a numbers advantage in this space?
Is a lack of support the reason this play dies?
Am I on the wall or have I built space to extend the play?
If I need to extend the play here, what is the first thing I should do?
Am I currently moving or stationary?
Where is my weight distributed on my skates? (centered, or on one leg)
Specific questions get specific answers. The best ask themselves questions and reflect.
Recommended Read on Self Reflection:
Great Article on Self Reflective Questions by Brian Kight
2. Systems Thinking vs. Goals Thinking
Goals thinking killed a lot of enjoyment by making sure I was never present.
Goals make you miserable… Now I know what you’re thinking. Let me explain.
Imagine you’re driving in a car on the highway. Your destination is 11 hours away. You are driving at the correct speed on the correct pathway to reach your destination in the correct timeframe. But you’re complaining about not being there yet.
This is what goals thinking does to you. It takes you out of the present and focuses you on what you don’t have. It places you into a limited emotional state of lack. You become a victim. You feel bad that you aren’t there yet.
When I played tier 3, my goal was tier 2.
When I played juniors, I wanted to commit to a college team.
When I was in college, the whole point was to become a pro player after 4 years.
And I didn’t enjoy any of the moments. Full stop.
I was on the right path, going at the right speed. Don’t get me wrong, I had “the systems” part down too, but I was more focused on outcomes.
If you’re on the right highway, going the right speed…
It’s going to take 11 hours, enjoy the ride.
The places you stop to eat.
The cities you pass.
The trees, the lakes. The fucking journey.
So what can you do to focus on systems thinking?
Example:
Let’s go back to the 4 Coactives Model from Fergus Connolly. For each coactive, you can associate a development activity with it. If you check the boxes with intent, purpose, and skill, there’s no way you can get worse that day.
Technical- Did I pick one skill to work on before and after practice?
Tactical- Did I watch and reflect on my shifts from the previous game?
Physical- Did I either train or recover how I should have today?
Psychological- Did I do any visualization or mindset practice today?
If you check those 4 boxes every day, it will move you further down the path in the right direction. It will keep you going at the right speed.
Keir Wenham-Flatt says,
“You can’t try twice as hard and have a baby in 4.5 months. It takes 9.”
Deeper Dive on Systems Thinking:
3 Inversion
Inversion is a mental model all about thinking backward. It will be difficult at first but then it will get to the point where it becomes your norm. Once you see inversion, you can’t unsee it.
Let’s use another example:
Say you’re 16 years old and you want to play in the NHL. Instead of asking, “How do I get to the NHL?”
You would invert it and say, “How would I act to make sure I don’t get to the NHL?”
You’ll get specific, clear-cut behaviors and habits to avoid.
Using inversion, you’ll get a pretty clear “don’t do” list
Stay up as late as possible every night
Wake up at different times every day
Stress out about things I can’t control
Practice in my comfort zone everyday
Skip skill sessions
Workout inconsistently or not at all
Never ask the coaches for feedback
Never watch film of my shifts
You get the point. Often the inversion is easier to see and do the opposite of than thinking traditionally about how to.
You can use inversion for almost anything, here is another example of how to use it to find out what your values are and make them easier to follow.
Dive Deeper on Inversion with These:
How Bill Belichick Stopped the Buffalo Bills
The Case for Inverting Your Values
Inversion and the Power of Avoiding Stupidity
Half Life Summary
You won’t learn about yourself until you reflect on your experiences
Specific questions get specific answers. Getting an answer you don’t want? Reframe the question
Systems thinking over goals thinking
Goals make you miserable
Get moving in the right direction at the correct speed and then enjoy the view along the way, you can’t have a baby in 4.5 months just because you “want it bad.”
Invert: How would I ensure that I don’t make it where I want to go?